Being a good steward

I just got back from Germany and took one of those private taxis which my colleague very kindly helped to book because it was cheaper. Recently I often just hail a London cab because I respect the drivers who have to work very hard to get their licence and feel like I should help them out a little in these tough times.

Then again I should be a good steward too of the resources entrusted to me. Hmmm. And these drivers are also suffering I guess.

Anyway, when we arrived I asked for a receipt. Usually these are handwritten. He handed me a blank receipt and said something to the effect that I could fill in the amount I wanted. I understood what he meant and told him no, he should fill out the amount agreed on, which was £50. He filled it out, handed it to me and I gave him the fare, plus a small tip because it had been quite a pleasant ride and he was very polite and helpful.

When he took the money and saw how much it was, he offered to write me a new receipt which I refused. He asked if I was sure and I said yes. 

I thought about it afterwards and it came to me that I could have added that while I could claim the taxi fare, the tip was from me. It wouldn't mean anything if I just included it in the claim, plus it would also be wrong. I would not have acted like a good steward if I did that.

How do we show love?

12 August 2021

I didn't know it at the time but two separate things happened yesterday that had a common thread.

The first was a debate on my Sunday soccer chat group over a comment/suggestion about how the government's covid restrictions were too strict and that those who were vaccinated should be able to have the freedom to choose to play if they could not harm anyone else. There was a suggestion made half in jest that they could just sign a letter of indemnity.

I said it was an attractive idea but commented that there were implications that might be complicated (Who and what is being indemnified? etc). And that it may not be true that you can't harm anyone - after all, you can still get infected even if you are vaccinated, and what if you infect a loved one at home? Sometimes I regret wading into such debates - it always starts because I have a different view of course. My intention is twofold - to get a better perspective through a civilized discussion, and hope that we all benefit from it. Anyway, the discussion ended not really going anywhere because we weren't on common ground.

Someone then said in the chat that they don't comment because they don't want to change anyone's mind.

It was this remark that triggered a reflection, and led to this post. At first, I was a little annoyed because I felt the comment was directed partly at me. While it is probably true that part of the reason for engaging is that I believe my view is correct, or at least less wrong, I am willing to concede (even if grudgingly) if there is a better position by the other person.

Then I thought that such a sentiment could also be a sign of arrogance. After all, one possible reason for not engaging is because you do not think it is worth doing so because you are convinced you are right, and there is no point in wasting time trying to change the other person's views. Of course the comment could also mean that sometimes there is no point in debating with a person who is not willing to concede - though that does not mean you shouldn't start. It's how you end that is more important. But more on that later.

I will admit that I have also made such decisions in a one-on-one conversation if I know the other party has extremely strong views and is not going to take kindly to my disagreement. But then I thought a little more about it and felt that, wouldn't it be better to have a discussion to at least set the perspective right? And this is all the more so in a chat group where there are other silent observers who may have views. Thereafter, with a better range of views, everyone is free to make up their own minds.

And this brought me back to the starting point which is all important. Why do we wish to engage? If the intent is to change the other person's mind and get them to admit you are right, then it is not done out of love. That is arrogance. However, to knowingly allow someone to persist with a view that may be wrong is to not show love.

Coincidentally I was struck by a somewhat similar sentiment today while listening to a radio interview of one of the intelligence chiefs in the UK. He said part of his job was to shine light where people didn't want it to be shone. Of course his perspective was couched in a negative light - he was talking about climate control agreements where countries were expected to abide by the commitments they had made to ensure a fair playing field, and if they were cheating, he wanted to make sure they were found out.

The Bible tells us to be a light, and that is to shine a positive light that shows God's love, that shows how He has transformed our lives. The all important detail then is how do we do this. Our pride is always lurking below the surface, even if we convince ourselves that we are doing it out of love and it is all too easy to let our arrogance take over and hammer home our arguments.

We will not get it right immediately, we will not always get it right and we will slip up along the way - I have. And when I do, I make it a point to apologise to the other party which I think is also an important way of showing humility. And in a way it allows the other party to show love when they forgive us.

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The second was a Facebook post from one of my favourite websites, The Philosophy of Motherhood about The power of beauty. It is about how we cannot defeat the arguments of those who do not believe with reason and logic.

It is why when I came across that quotation while surfing a golf souvenir website, the sentiment about love resonated so strongly with me that I had to share it with you boys. I may not be the most communicative father or husband, and sometimes I have trouble finding the occasion or opportunity to tell you how I feel, but know that I love you all very much.

The current church Bible reading campaign on 1 Corinthians could not be more timely. Whatever we do, if not done out of love, is meaningless and shows our faith in a poor light.