Working out mentally and physically in quarantine

Coping with cabin fever in a small cabin is not easy.  Could be worse I suppose. I heard some earlier groups (maybe foreigners) were put in hotels that weren't very clean. Anyway, keeping active is tough but after a while, you just do it to break the monotony. Push ups, squats, pilates...

 https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ZWk19OVon2k

I decided that apart from the workout videos I have used before, it would be fun to try this.  Guess I would have really struggled in Fanzine.  Not easy (for me) but good fun. Also tried some others. Not as intense as a run but at least it gets the old ticker pumping. And learning something new triggers positive developments in cognitive capabilities, forcing the brain to develop new pathways. If I had persevered with learning to play the guitar, this would be a perfect environment/situation for it.

Space-wise, it's not ideal but just about big enough. With the nice view, it's also a good opportunity to try stuff like time-lapse photography. Oh, there's still work to do of course hahaha...

While I was doing a workout or thinking about one, I suddenly remembered this hotel in Stockholm that I was in a couple of years ago.  They were ahead of their time in thinking about how to keep their guests occupied with healthy pursuits - in the room.  This would have been great for me.

The other thing to do is read. It is really unhealthy to spend too much time online, not only because most of what you do isn't that important, but also really bad for your eyes and body. So I have made it a point to get up, look out in the distance to give the eyes a break, and also stand to read when I feel sleepy.

There is so much to learn still, to understand what others are thinking so that we can empathize more, and judge less. I had a Whatsapp chat with a schoolmate that was really good - we've known each other for a long time, but not well. I must confess I don't have very good friendships from school because I was not very active back then, and kept to a very small group that I eventually grew apart from anyway. So when my cohort had a reunion two years ago, it spawned many reconnections, including this friend who I met in London when he travelled there. And it turns out he's also an executive coach! We agreed that one of the most difficult parts of coaching is listening!! Funny and sad because listening is a very rare trait you find in many people these days.  Everyone is in a hurry to tell you what they think, not to hear what you think. 

(Sort of related to this: There is a Netflix series called "Pretend it's a city" in which the writer Fran Lebowitz, who's sort of like a female cross between Woody Allen and Jerry Seinfeld, gives her opinion on a wide range of topics, but mostly about New York city. And one of the lines from her that really got my attention was when she was asked if she ever got angry because of things she doesn't like. She said, "The anger is, I have no power, but I'm filled with opinions." Which pretty much describes the state of affairs in the world today.)

Coincidentally on this topic of friendship, today I was reading Law's Empire. It was recommended by my former boss who loved the book because it was written by his Oxford professor, Ronald Dworkin. It's fascinating because it isn't just about law, but also about politics, sociology, philosophy and is profoundly thought-provoking. And today I read a section about community. What makes our friends, friends? Are there certain pre-agreed conditions, obligations or responsibilities involved? It's fascinating because like many other things in life which we don't think deeply enough about, we just sort of adopt certain concepts almost unthinkingly, and yet which we recognise when we see it.

Anyway this is a long-winded way of getting to the point which I just thought of, and not because I had it in mind when I started writing this (which is an interesting point in itself - more on this later). The point being that we need to take care of not only our physical bodies but also our mind/intellect. And just as we grow stronger in physical exercise by pushing ourselves past previous real or imagined limits, so too do we need to improve our mental capacities by tackling tougher subjects. 

Law's Empire is a book I started many many months ago. It is a tough read because it attempts to tackle very complex ideas, many of which as I said earlier, cut across different disciplines. I find myself reading and re-reading many passages because of the intricacies of the arguments - and which require a certain dexterity of language that is challenging to grasp. Ultimately though, the payoff is great when you do get it. But it is so difficult that I keep stopping, and turning to other books almost for relief. I am determined to finish it this time while in the hotel.

Back to the point about realising that I actually had a real point to make in writing this post. Writing is also a skill that you need to practice. I guess some people can work out in their head what they are going to say, and then put pen to paper. I am not quite like that. I start writing with just the seed of an idea, and sometimes I don't know where I am going with it and along the way I have a eureka moment, an epiphany and the rest of the post almost writes itself.  Well, not quite but you know what I mean. (Also this is serendipitous because the sermon this week by Pastor Lilian touched on reflection. Again one of those things we don't do enough of. It used to be called daydreaming in my day hahaha...)

So long story short, don't play too many computer games or spend time just surfing because while you get better at the game, or get more information from social media, it is either not productive (you may end up later wondering "where did all that time go?" "what have I actually learned?") or not structured (you might be great at Trivial Pursuit but not much else) or both.

"Home"

I had hoped for a nice view with a balcony and this was ok.  Initially I had hoped for something similar to what my colleague got, which was a nice view of MBS and the bay. But the lights and the bustle of the streets below provide a different sort of peace and beauty and I have come to really like how different it looks at different times of the day, with different weather conditions, the play of the light of the rising/setting sun on the buildings. There is a slight hum of life even deep into the night, and  some construction work too haha...I think it's MRT work along North Bridge Road.

The following day, I got a much better view of the area in the day.  On the first Sunday I am back, to be rewarded with a view of Wesley MC was a real blessing.

And so I did worship online while facing the church - I think my view would be like the side wing on the left of the sanctuary. I joked with someone that it was like facing Mecca, and was reminded by that person that it was like Daniel praying. I was a little embarrassed that I had forgotten this from Daniel 6:10:

"Now when Daniel learned that the decree had been published, he went home to his upstairs room where the windows opened toward Jerusalem. Three times a day he got down on his knees and prayed, giving thanks to his God, just as he had done before"

A good reminder to keep up with our Bible reading. There is always something new I learn each time, no matter how many times I may have read a particular verse before. And incidents like this will help drive home the point in our minds. 

 

Man-made solutions

Took me some time to finish this:

Inauguration Day. Or Golfing Day as mummy put it. He who shall not be named, is not showing up to hand over the reins, and perhaps that is for the best for all concerned. It is just incredible how much anger and division he has managed to stoke - but the more amazing thing for me is how many people voted for him, that is, thought he was fit to lead. Or to be more accurate, thought he was fit to continue to lead despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary. You could sort of excuse them the first time round - no one in their wildest imagination could have predicted how the past 4 years have turned out. But having lived through his presidency, they thought what?!

So many troubling questions...

Many people have gotten into arguments and debates over the political divide, including non-Americans which I understand better now. There was a time when like many others, I did not understand how people could see themselves supporting such a character. Why would you? How could you? Why does it matter so much to those who don't have much of a stake in the outcome?

First, some context. I think the main cause of the ills of the world has always been man's rebellion against God, against control. This is the paradox at the heart of our relationship with God. He gave us free will, to choose to believe (or not), to decide how to live our lives.  

Those who reject God want to believe that they can either overcome evil/sin, or embrace it totally in their own lust for power. By overcoming evil, I mean they believe that they can fashion some kind of system or structure e.g. democracy, that will defeat man's worst instincts like selfishness and greed. This is founded on the belief that most people are rational and good and will act according to their best interests and that the sum of all such individual interests will result in the greater good. Including the belief that those we elect will act in our best interests. And that there are enough checks and balances that can be built in to prevent corruption, abuse of power etc. Or something like that. 

There is a long debate or discussion to be had about this (maybe some other time) but suffice to say for now, democracy is what got Trump elected - and contrary to what the liberal media is crowing now, Biden's election/inauguration is not about democracy 'winning'. He won an election that's all.  Democracy does not win just because your guy got elected. In fact you could make a case that democracy didn't do too well in a system that allowed Trump to peddle his lies and mislead millions of people, or if you prefer, said what they wanted to hear.

Which brings us to the more troubling group.

Those who believe in God still have to decide how to reconcile their faith with how to live in a broken world. Some find themselves torn between imperfect choices in most cases - but that feeling is not a bad thing because it means they understand the problem rather than over-simplifying things. Some choose to ignore integrity issues of the party/candidates because they think it is better to vote for someone who professes the same faith or appears to support the values we must uphold.

In some cases, I think they have chosen the wrong perspective with which to view the issues.  The two most distinctive are of course the LGBT and abortion (or pro-life) issues. To reduce the complex decision of how to vote down to a single issue is firstly, probably overly simplistic. I joked with someone that some people might support Hitler today if he was pro-life. 

Secondly, there is a big difference between being forced to make choices incompatible with our faith, and allowing choice to be made by all. The key for Christians is freedom to practice our faith and about loving everyone - if we seek to impose our values on all, how are we different from those religions that want their religious laws to replace secular laws? If we seek to establish God's kingdom on earth through our own efforts, we will obviously fail but will also show our intolerance that will not glorify God.

None of this is to say we support these issues (like LGBT and abortion), but only that we should not confuse how we should live our own lives versus what kind of leader/government we should choose and the type of society we want to live in.  None of the those issues are about forcing believers to do something against their faith. And voting for the better candidate (however you define it) who happens to endorse freedom of choice which overall makes for a more tolerant society isn't wrong in my view.

And this is the real question. All politicians, whether they are believers or not, have to find a way, a perspective to balance these competing tensions. Many other Christians, also find themselves in jobs or positions where they have to contend with such issues. My take on why some believers argue so strongly about some of these issues in the political arena is because of sin.

It is about pride, arrogance and self-righteousness in most cases.  If they truly understand what Christ wants us to do, and examine our hearts, and find that love is not the driving motivation behind their thoughts and actions on a particular issue, the most common cause or reason is that they want to become Pharisees.  They want to show that they are more righteous because they are fighting for the cause, to defend the faith which is under attack.  Most of the time, it is not our faith that is under attack but people want to believe it is because it fits with what they want to do, which is express outrage.

Outrage is the defining characteristic of the world today. Woke culture, cancel culture are all products of anger and pride, especially when people reject God and seek meaning and identity in other things.  And if we answer that rage and anger with our own, we have not followed in Jesus' steps or obeyed his commandment.  And for believers, some will justify their outrage by saying that Jesus also spoke out very strongly at some points in His life, and so for them, love is not the key message.

That is selective interpretation, and a dead giveaway when discussing issues with believers who have extreme views.  So they pick and choose according to what they want to justify.  And they will even reject the commandment about love simply because it does not fit in with what they choose to believe. I think the starting point is key.

I think these two biblical references are most relevant and helpful.

Mark 12:13-17 Render unto Caesar what is Caesar's and to God what is God's.

Romans 13:1-7 Let every person be subject to the governing authorities,

What do these verses tell us? That we should obey the law and be good citizens. They don't tell us to rebel because some parts of the law aren't to our liking. This isn't to say we should not call out injustice where we find it, but to do so lawfully. In my view, the key message for us is the acceptance/belief that we are all hopeless sinners and Jesus is our only path to salvation.  And so Jesus lays out the path for us very simply because He knows there is no other way. Try as we might, we cannot eradicate sin on our own. And so He tells us to love Him above all else, and to love others. He never told us to fight His battles for Him on earth - the Jews made that mistake at first because they thought He was a political Messiah. 

In my view, the politicisation of faith by the American brand of democracy (or syncretism - blending of various beliefs into one) makes the same mistake (possibly willingly) And it has affected believers everywhere. The history of Christianity over the ages has many instances in which it becomes a powerful political force, either co-opted by those politicians or power brokers who understand how to manipulate it, as well as when the church leadership sought power for itself. Other people have said all this better, especially in a link I shared recently. Here it is again, if you didn't read the article. 

https://ponderingprinciples.com/2021/01/23/meditating-on-the-meditation/

Why does all this matter?  Or does it?

It matters not because as some people believe, that we must do everything we can to convince others to come round to our view, and that the world will be a better place because of this. But today, it doesn't work. Today, people find their positions very quickly and dig in. The assumption here is that you are right, and others are wrong (likewise on the other side); and increasingly, the assumption is also that you have the insight and wisdom, and the other does not. Everything is black or white, with no room for disagreement and compromise. Thus the debate becomes more personal, more divisive, with less and less room for civility.  And if that is the result, people stop listening and make up their own minds based on feelings and sentiment, instead of reasoned arguments. So in my view, the idea that good ideas will prevail ultimately, is losing credibility because the arguments almost don't matter anymore in the age of conspiracy theories.

But for those of us who want to walk on the right path, it is important to find the truth for ourselves - not to convince others so that we form the majority. That may never happen, and in fact it does not happen for many believers in many parts of the world. That is not our goal. We seek the truth so that we are not personally misled. It sounds almost too simplistic doesn't it?  Well the book of Revelation (and other books especially in the OT) tells us different.  Even when there is a great deal of evidence staring you in the face, people may still choose to believe otherwise and turn away from God, from what is good.

Which brings me back to the point made at the beginning about why so many supported Trump and why. We also need to seek understanding. Surely not all of his millions of supporters are totally blind to his faults, or are gun-toting rednecks - though the media does its part to play up that idea. Good for the ratings of course. We need discernment. Trump may be gone (hopefully) but he wasn't the architect of the divisions in society - he only knew how to tap into them better than anyone else.

The strange new world of air travel and covid

Forgot to tell you guys about my trip to Heathrow. I decided not to pre-book a taxi - for one, I think the regular service which I had used the last few trips had become not so reliable - he would often not reply until I sent another text message. Secondly, I thought about how the regular taxi drivers were probably suffering quite a bit (like in Singapore, you see many of them just waiting somewhere) and decided that I would just hail one. Didn't have to wait long, and it didn't cost a lot more than pre-booking a ride (though I suspect Uber would be cheaper). Got in, and rolled down the window (thankfully it wasn't cold). At the end of the ride, after paying 67 pounds, I gave the driver a 10 pound tip as I figured he could use it now more than ever. I think he was surprised and thanked me a few times.

I was reminded of this incident by a few things. We tend to take things for granted, to complain about every little thing, and forget how people elsewhere are really suffering - actually there are people in Singapore who are also suffering but not as many and maybe not as much. Life has returned to something resembling normal, shops are open, restaurants are open and the government is working hard to make sure things stay under control.

So when they announced new measures like vaccinations for the elderly, and restrictions for CNY (no shouting of "huat ah!"), people started complaining or making snide remarks like why they are not surprised that the vaccinations would start in Tanjong Pagar and AMK GRCs - insinuating that these are the wards of PM and Chan Chun Sing. When you are biased and cynical, the world truly looks different to you. Maybe he (the chap who commented) didn't read the actual announcement (or perhaps it was not explained immediately) and was simply responding to a post. But it was telling and I hope that I do not become so cynical - I responded by asking simply if the reason could be because these are the wards with the most elderly? (which was the official reason given)  No judgement but just simply pointing out other possibilities. He might be right after all, but it's unproductive wasting our life away by being angry or hateful. Not only that, when others chipped in with maps showing the demographics of different areas, he did not back down. This is the danger of pride - it's very difficult to back down once you take a stand with that. Better to start with humility and it's easier to stay in that mode.

The other comment about how the advice not to shout auspicious phrases was not scientific, or meaningless since that was the whole point of lo hei was to me, just off the mark. We are truly so fortunate to be able to ease restrictions, that to complain about a simple change to the way we celebrate seems churlish. I just commented that I had spent nearly 4 months in lockdown, all because the Brits decided Christmas should be celebrated like in normal times. I think it's important to put things in perspective so that people will calm down a bit. And there's no prohibition to shouting if you do your lo hei at home.

Back to our regular programming...

So they let those in Business get off the plane first, and we went into the gatehold room - the room where you normally wait before boarding a flight. Then the rest of the flight came in. Strange thing is there didn't seem to be a system of deciding who goes out first for the swab test - this is done at an area near the immigration counter. Some of the business class went off first, then they went with those from economy and I was in the last group together with some others from business class - in fact I was the very last person on the whole flight to get swabbed. I was not too bothered about it - but I can imagine others who might be. When we got to the hotel, I was also not in too much of a rush to get to my room - it would be my last time outside the room and might as well make the most of it right? Heh.

The airport now looks like some sort of military operation - there are large groups of people in yellow PPE (these are the health workers), there are people in blue overalls (not sure who they are), and others. Movement for arrivals is tightly controlled and we are shepherded around in small groups everywhere. Wonder what will happen if I make a break for it?! Shops are still open for outgoing passengers in the transit area - but the duty-free on arrival is closed as they obviously don't want people wandering around.

While waiting for my swab, I went to the toilet - they told me to use the handicap toilet. For the first time, I feel like some sort of outcast - but I understand the caution. It's a matter of perspective. For the staff, they see us collectively as a potential hazard. For me as an individual traveler, I see that but I also see other travelers as a potential threat to me. Which is why I was a bit uncomfortable when we were being cleared at the immigration counter. We had to put our thumbs on the scanner, and take off and put our masks back on. Though I have to commend the ICA officer who attended to me - when she saw me trying to get some sanitizer after the clearance, she whipped out a bottle very quickly. Overheard some officers speaking about closing the counters after me, but keeping another lane open for some seamen. This will become important later.

 

After clearance, we were led to collect our luggage and while walking to the baggage belt, I saw a queue of people who were all having their luggage scanned and I got a little worried. I would have to explain the bottles in my luggage but then again, it was just about declaring what I had - the other concern was about holding up the rest of my group. However, after collecting the luggage, we were led straight to the mini-bus. Then I realised that those who were being checked must have been the seamen that the officers were talking about. Seamen as a group are typically viewed as higher risk.

We got on the bus first, and the luggage loaded on. No one told us anything, and no one asked where we were going. Maybe they already knew. It was truly a magical mystery tour.

It was reassuring to see these sights, even the simple sight of the lights at McD's along the ECP. I was hoping we would be at Swissotel (no "h" - learnt something new) after someone showed me a picture of the view from his room - similar to this picture. Then we turned off into Suntec and for a moment I thought we might be going to the Ritz Carlton hahaha... the driver drove around the Fountain of Wealth and turned into the small slip road leading to Nicoll Highway - I told you guys I thought it was for good luck haha... Learnt something new again. It's a route to Swissotel without going through Beach Road though I am not sure it saves time or anything (or is shorter).

Home for the next 14 days. My first ever staycation. At check-in, I was asked if I wanted one or two portions for my meals for that night and the next day. I laughed and said if I was not going to be moving around much, I should stick to one portion. Food is ordered for the next day by scanning a QR code before 12 pm. Having a room high up is great (32nd floor) and it was great to have a balcony and get some fresh air. In London, I rarely leave the door open. Unless I set off the smoke alarm again, or want to get rid of cooking smells. And for the first time in a while, I slept without the airconditioning - by choice. After all, I have done so when the airconditioning breaks down.

One of the interesting rules is that you have to wear a mask when you go onto the balcony. They also warn you that if you don't obey the rules, "your access to some of the amenities in the hotel (e.g. wifi) may be compromised"  I think that's the most effective threat ever haha.

Pre-departure and flying home

Good to be home. The last few days before leaving had been depressing, alleviated only by my forays out to run - or shop for food. It was I think, just a combination of the isolation, the lack of productive work, the cold, and the fatigue (both mental and physical). I had been pushing a bit harder because I knew I would not be doing much for 3 weeks and it caught up with me a little. Before the flight, I decided to do a longish run because it would make me tired and I could then sleep on the plane.

I felt tired and lethargic even before I started the run, but just decided to take it easy and to keep going as long as I felt comfortable. Turns out, the correlation between my mental and physical state wasn't that strong. When I checked my stats, I was still doing a decent pace. Maybe I am getting back my fitness. It was actually a beautiful day, and I almost felt sad about leaving.

That feeling was probably also a reaction from a few days before when I started packing. I had come home in March last year thinking I was going to be away for a few weeks and ended up staying 6 months. This time round, I wondered how long I might be away. Life seems more uncertain, and it almost seems foolish to make plans that are too firm. I couldn't help thinking that I might not come back to London so I sort of packed some stuff that I would miss if I did not come back. ICA colleague of mine lost some stuff when he could not return to London and had to engage movers to go into his flat and ship his belongings home.

When I caught myself thinking that about missing things, I felt silly. These are just things. So what if I lose them? They can be replaced. We are not to be attached to material things in this world. From another perspective, I would almost be glad if the decision was taken out of my hands and I could not go back, or could not go back for a long time.  I had answered the call of duty, but clearly this wasn't quite what I had bargained for.  Well at least in one respect, nobody could say I was having a good time there - at least those who knew what it's like to be away from family.  And in lockdown.

Anyway, among the things I had to settle before leaving - had to clean the toilets, do all the laundry (from my last run), clear the trash - I managed to finish almost all the food I had in the fridge before leaving. Ice-cream - made sure of that two days before. Finished one last serving of sweet potato soup, and pork ribs in chicken broth after the run. Had to throw away some vegetables, onions, garlic. Wanted to give my stomach a rest before flying - too much fibre, and veggies that cause gas are not good. Worked out pretty well - did not feel uncomfortable at all during the flight.

What also helped is that I ate quite sparingly on the plane.  Well it helped that the food is not so great anymore.  Choices are more limited, and they serve it all on a plastic tray.  It is still a lot of food though and I guess they are trying their best. And I avoided anything that might cause stomach distress. I only watched 2 full movies - managed to sleep quite well because I was tired from the noonday run - you know what they say about mad dogs and Englishmen. Watched Mulan - it was disappointing. Just odd hearing them speak in that cliched stilted English - anything else would have been an improvement.  Why not just speak good English, or do it in Mandarin? Oh wait, the second option is out because these are all American actors. The only one who wasn't 'acting' in her speaking was Gong Li - it's the same thing she was ridiculed for years ago when she did the movie version of Miami Vice. The other movie I caught was last year's Chinese New Year movie from HK which has become a tradition of sorts. They are all titled "All's Well Ends Well". The series started in the 90s but they are not connected. What they do is come up with some farcical story played strongly for laughs, and get popular actors to either play the main roles or show up for cameos. This 2020 version was not bad.

Oh and I went to the Lufthansa lounge at Heathrow before the flight and had a sandwich and some apple juice. The SQ lounge is no longer operating - which is sad because it's a reflection of the times, but also because the food there was so much better!  OK in fairness I have not been to the Lufthansa lounge before so I don't know if this experience was reflective of what it was like before the pandemic.

I had the chicken briyani for dinner.  Not bad. There was some fish as a starter, dessert, garlic bread, fruit, cheese and crackers. Lunch was served at 4 pm Singapore time and I had dry wonton noodles. Wonton was not bad, char siew was very dry, and noodles were meh... Starter was some pasta and chicken(?), fruit, dessert (some kind of pastry with cream), a dry roll, and the same cheese and crackers. Maybe I should have gone for the all-day breakfast.

Last time I flew, the crew just wore face masks.  Now they are in full PPE gear over the kebaya.  It was strange but they did their best under the circumstances. I think the PPE gear helps them stay safe and they probably don't have to do the full quarantine (maybe they just do a turn-around so they don't go into London). Otherwise it makes no sense for them to fly, and then do the 21 days.

Saw this as the plane was going into the landing - the juxtaposition of the dark clouds and the clear sky on the right was stunning and in a way captured my mood about coming home. From darkness and depression to light and home. Hope whoever's out on the course got to finish their game.

Staaaaaaaycation

Well that bubble got popped pretty quickly.

This morning I felt good, thinking that in a couple of days I was going to be flying home and seeing you guys.  First there was the small matter of finishing the enforced staycation in the hotel - if it's one of those where you can't open the windows it would be terrible. Ideally there would be a balcony or something.  Ideally it would be one of the villas on Sentosa with a private pool...  With a home gym inside.  And Grab delivering all my favourite hawker meals.

I had done the 14 days before but it's not quite the same because I could go out to the supermarket here.  And the flat is big enough with enough home comforts so it wasn't that much deprivation you know?  Now I have to figure out what to bring to keep myself occupied.  I don't suppose there's going to be Singtel TV to catch my football.  So maybe a good chance to catch up on my reading.

So I had it all worked out in my head that I was going to do 14 days, and then it would be great to be home to see you guys and get to go out and do stuff together.  Grab some great local food, go to the range and hit balls, maybe even play a round of golf or two, and just hang out.  Now I have to deal with being cooped up at home for another week.

Oh I know it's not so bad, at least I will be home but it's just frustrating.  This is literally like someone moved the finishing line.  Like I signed up to run a half-marathon and when I am approaching the finish, I am told I need to run the whole thing again to get my finisher's t-shirt.  The main frustration for me is that there was no real rationale given, other than 'additional precaution" or something to that effect.

Guess we are the guinea pigs.  It's mainly frustrating because there's no real explanation given other than just taking extra precautions.  In a way, the lack of explanation will affect how people choose to interpret the isolation at home which may then affect the effectiveness of the additional 7 days.  Of course, the thinking behind it may be that they hope people will be responsible and not want to endanger their family or friends by breaching the home SHN.

This is where in public policy, you often have to understand what your primary premise is, and whether it is going to play out the way you imagined.  Do people mostly do the right thing?  Even if some don't, how critical is their impact?  If the price of non-compliance is very high or unacceptable, you don't leave it to chance.

I guess this scenario isn't quite like that.  It is probably as it says, just being extra careful, and they think it's a small price to pay.  That's probably true, though it would be nice if they allowed more lead time, seeing as the situation back home isn't as serious, and given that our mandatory SHN in hotels has largely worked.  If it hadn't there would have been more community cases by now that were traced to imported cases that didn't test positive.

And this is where sometimes government policies and announcements need to be accompanied by a human and humane touch, to express some empathy and compassion for those who are affected.  This will enhance compliance, and in a best-case scenario, even support from those affected.

Anyway I am still glad I am coming home - that's the most important thing.

Faith and common sense

For the first time since the pandemic began, I worry a little.

The news of the rising spread of the new variant, and the prediction that cases are going to spike in the next few weeks and might possibly overwhelm hospitals was sobering.  I could take all precautions and hole up in the flat, but would still need to go out for supplies and you never know what could happen - and when fatigue sets in, so does carelessness.  If I fall sick here under the current conditions where hospitals are struggling, it could be disastrous.

So when news came that we would be brought home for vaccination, that was very much welcome.  I very much look forward to coming home, not just because of safety but also I miss you all very much.  The time alone has taken a bit of a toll, but keeping busy and occupied has helped.  Writing this blog has also been a great source of comfort.

The other great source of comfort has been prayer and fellowship online.  Faith is our rock, and yet as these times show, faith is sometimes misused and misplaced (?) and that may lead to other problems. I pray for protection, guidance and wisdom to guide me through difficult times and help me make the right choices.  With the news that vaccines have been developed and being rolled out, there are believers who deem it dangerous for various reasons.  Just as there have been those who dismiss this as a hoax, or simply believe that God will protect them from illness, or heal them miraculously.  One group that believes this are Christian Scientists (there are others).

They may have seemingly convincing reasons, but I always detect a hint of arrogance or pride in the arguments, that they somehow have the inside track on what God wants or approves of, and often it's almost as if the more extreme the position the better for them.  Or that their faith is so strong that they trust God protects them no matter what.

There are some who argue that this is like the devil tempting God (Matthew 4:5-7) and putting Him to the test. I guess this is like saying "Yes, God can protect and heal you but maybe that's not part of the plan, or you are not as high on the agenda as you think you are." Otherwise there would be no believers who die of illness right?  Of course they will still argue that those who died or fell ill weren't strong enough in their faith.  I have one word for them. Job.  

The other way to test their theories is to see if it applies universally to everything in their lives.  Someone said they would not take the covid vaccine because it was introducing foreign DNA into the body or something along those lines. And that this is not what God intended for our bodies. Hmm... It just sounds made up right?

Other more...interesting arguments include one that says the vaccine is the mark of the beast as described in the Book of Revelation.  Right... I can't say if they are right or loony, but again it sounds like they just want to find a biblical reason to be different or contrarian.

Then there are those who are perhaps confused. They say it's not safe because the testing was rushed.  Well perhaps but that's not a biblical argument in any case.

Pride is hurting the world

I thought I would share this story because in a small way, with all the craziness in the world these past few days/months with the pandemic and the storming of Capitol Hill in the US, it was a small attempt on my part to understand and make sense of why things are the way they are and do whatever little I could to help.  I have learned a lot on this journey.

Some background.  I was asked to take over this year as one of the admins in a Whatsapp chat group of my old schoolmates.  Now I don't know if any of you are in a chat group with individuals that have extremely strong opinions.  Things can get heated up pretty quickly.  I wasn't that eager to take it up, and in fact I had contemplated leaving the group before when some people made some personal comments - in the end I did not leave and just made peace with it.  Deleting the messages is a key step.  It meant I did not hold on to whatever negative feelings I held about the comments, and let them go so that they did not have control over my emotions.

Anyway I agreed to take over as an admin but I could never imagine that my schoolmates in Singapore would get so worked up about the US elections - until I realised that the most vocal were those who were living there, and naturally it is a matter of great importance to them. The other chat group that got slightly heated up was a prayer chatgroup of schoolmates who were brothers in Christ - naturally the tensions there revolved around whether Trump was the incarnation of the devil himself, or the Lion of Judah (I'm not kidding - someone shared a post from some evangelist that used this description.  Some tips on assessing such posts - making such proclamations without proof, and then using that as a fear tactic i.e. Do not challenge Trump because he is anointed by God, is probably an indication that this is on some seriously shaky ground.  So now that Biden won, what has the Lion become?  Or is Biden now the Lion?  Who knows?)

That prayer chatgroup experience is relevant to this story because along the way, people shared what I felt were really aggressive posts with a clear political agenda.  Before that, the posts were usually balanced in seeking to understand both sides from a believer's perspective.  The new posts that got my attention were along the lines of "Voting Biden makes you a baby killer".  Taking a complex decision about choosing the best candidate, and boiling it down to such a simplistic argument was not the best way, in my view, to think about the subject.  I kept my counsel about what I thought about the argument itself, but shared with the group that I thought it best to keep politics out of the prayer chatgroup because it was becoming divisive.  Someone said they were just sharing posts so that we had views from different perspectives - my reply was that if the posts were balanced, that was fine but anything that demonized people who had a different opinion, did not show the love that Christ called for.  But I also did say that it was just a suggestion and if others did not agree, I was fine with it.

Interestingly, someone asked if the same thing was happening on the main chat (which has a few hundred members). I said I was ok with it there - though I didn't know at the time how bad it would get.  To cut a long story short -a heated debate started between those who believe Biden won, and those who believed Trump was robbed.  There is clearly little or no evidence for the latter but once people publicly plant their flag, they are going to die on that mountain in the online world for which there is little personal price to pay.  So there is no way to convince them otherwise.  And you really should not try, but...pride gets in the way.

Things got heated, and the chap who believed the election was stolen from Trump, was being berated (I appealed for calm and civility, which worked for a while) for his views - he insists his version is the truth and that others are close-minded for not listening to him.  He wrote to me since I was an admin, and told me how he felt bullied, and that others sympathised with him - and that this sort of bullying behavior was discouraging participation in the chat.

I debated whether to reply at all, because he said he was just sharing his thoughts.  It would however have been rude not to.  And since he was commenting about the behavior of members, I thought that I ought to respond, and to share what the admins felt was the best way to manage the chat in order to serve the best interests of members. I did not want to take the approach that others had used - which was to engage him on his points.  He was not going to be convinced.

And that is the crux of the problem - the world today is full of people who feel that they know better, and are so busy trying to convince you that they are right that they don't listen.  Hence the title of this post.  And I am sharing this because I think that along the way, I found an approach where I was fair to him, even if I did not agree with his views. 

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Thanks YP.

Let me try to address the points you've made and explain how the admins aim to do their best to keep discussions flowing. (Full disclosure: I do not agree with most of what you claim is "truth" or "evidence" but let's put that aside for now).

I think the vast majority of discussions have been acceptable to most members, and so the admins have seen little need to intervene. There have obviously been flashpoints (inevitable when people on all sides express strong opinions) but they are mostly peacefully resolved among the parties themselves.  This is our preferred mode of operation.

You pointed out that some members are unhappy about what they see as overly robust challenges, or with the tone which people make their points and that this will discourage participation. 

I understand the concerns, and they are not new.  This is where we have decided to adopt a light touch for a few reasons.  Firstly, I believe most if not all are like yourself, willing to share their views and no malice is intended.  Some members may slightly overstep the line occasionally but I do not think there are any who have been consistently rude or personal - we will step in in such cases. (Another circumstance where we might do so is when a topic dominates the chat to an extent that we get complaints. Then we may tell the main participants to start a separate chat)

The most important reason for a light touch is that robust debate is good because it sharpens the arguments.  People who choose not to engage because they don't want to deal with a robust rebuttal, make their own choices.  If it means less participation then so be it.  I'm not sure we wanted participation (whatever that means) for its own sake.  This is my own opinion by the way.  

As I said earlier, sometimes comments (on all sides) are uncalled for, or at least should not have been said in a certain manner, and here I do appreciate those members who choose to not respond and thus help to defuse tensions.  They show themselves to be the better man, and that they treasure relationships more than winning the arguments.

Hope this helps.

Unearthed

Today I tried to log into my office internet laptop and failed to do so initially as I had remembered the wrong password. I checked a note taking app where I thought I had stored it and it wasn't updated.  Anyway the important thing was I managed to remember what I had changed the password to.  I decided there and then to stop using the app and went through all the old notes I had made on it (to see what was worth keeping) and came across this one.  It must have been a draft for maybe a FB post.  Or maybe I decided it would be my autobiography.  The opening lines suggest it was written in March of 2017. 

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Cheers. My father, who loved his beer, passed away 19 years ago today, just as I began to fully appreciate what he meant to me.  Over the years, I have also slowly come to realise how that had shaped my relationship with my own kids. He was a man of few words, to me at least, being the quintessential Asian father. His reticence, as a parent, is something that I am conscious of with my own children.  Besides trying to to talk to them more, I guess subconsciously I started posting on social media to give them a better sense of who I am and I hope that they will come to understand a bit more of me when they read my posts (if they read my posts!). Well, it's out there and they can search for it when I am gone. (Note to self: remove any embarrassing posts or pictures. Actually, when I'm gone, why would it even matter?!😂)

That is something i can leave them with.  As well as my collection of books and movies ( many of which are still unread, or unwatched) but at least they would have a sense of how impeccable my tastes were. Are. Just saying.  I'm proud to have at least introduced them to great music from my era. 

 My father only had a primary school education and taught himself English, and whatever other dialects or languages he needed for his work, as was common among his generation. Later after his passing, when i was going through his stuff, I would come across his little scraps of paper where he wrote down English words, with the Chinese translation next to them.  I guessed that was how he learned the language and it made me proud that he was a life-long learner. I am definitely not as proficient as he was.  

I was only ever comfortable in English and we did not speak that much as my Cantonese was, and still is, passable at best. I do not really recall any harsh words from him, except for a hazy recollection of him sternly warning me to get my recitation of the multiplication tables right... in Cantonese. It's hard wired in my brain now and I still multiply things in my head in Cantonese to this day.

He never complained, I hardly ever saw him sick, or maybe he didn't let on that he was. He doted on my mother in his own way and indulged her whims and soothed her insecurities, to the extent that he did not travel for holidays because she didn't like travel as she had a weak disposition.  Maybe he had seen enough of the world in his younger days as a seaman and willingly put aside any remnants of wanderlust that he might still have. 

I respected him deeply as a father, and as a person but only came to love him fully later when I understood more.  That respect created a little distance and I was also caught in a generation gap.  

He didn't really interfere with what I did or the choices I made and I respected him for that. The only time I recall him intervening was when he banned me from playing soccer after I broke my arm playing in school.  Even then, he didn't really enforce it anyway. I think he understood how much I loved playing. My childhood was a pretty carefree one and soccer was a big part of it.

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That was as far as I got to in my draft.  I will probably continue it in another post.

0 to 1

December 31, 2020

OK I get a lot of the sentiments about how 2020 was a total washout, should never be remembered or ought to be part of an overall selective amnesia in our history.  There are many who have suffered - directly through illness or losing loved ones, or indirectly in stress and worry, in losing jobs and so on.  And those of us who have not suffered as much, or even at all (for those used to living life as a loner), should not make light of it.  I have been through some tough moments here, and it has given me some real insight and empathy for those who feel the pain of loneliness, the lack of a kind word, even a friendly pat on the back or arm which we may have thought nothing of previously.

What has gotten me through is turning to God, reading His Word regularly and remembering that the best remedy is to seek His guidance.  The breakthrough that came to me was nothing new.  Love others.  Isn't it amazing how we spend so much time analysing and over-analysing our problems, seeking relief through focusing on our own pleasures, when the real solution is to focus on others?

Which is a rather long-winded way of saying that even in a bad year like 2020, there are things we can be positive about (hopefully not test results heh) and there are opportunities to do good work to glorify God.  Helping others - which is why I gave you guys the money to do some good.  I thought it would be a good way to shape the way you think about being blessed and how to bless others.  Of course it isn't the only way.  There is no need to do big things, or make grand gestures.  Sometimes just being available is enough.  

Like when I asked my boss if there was anything I could help with during those months when I was stuck at home.  Quite similar to what I am going through now, come to think of it.  It is easy to take the easy way out and just sit at home doing nothing but it does not feel right.  I think that moment was really God's way of giving me an opportunity to glorify Him.  I was prompted to raise my hand to say, "What can I do to help?"  And God did the rest.  All the work I had done in previous years (the stint with MOM etc) had led to that moment - and He had provided for me in those years as well, when I earned the trust of those who now felt I could help.

It is important to earn trust.  Even when I was first back home and told not to return to London, I made sure that I fulfilled my responsibilities.  I was an officer representing the country and answered (partly) to the head of mission, and if I was not going back to London for any extended period, I had to keep her informed and seek her agreement.  This was before my assignment with MOM, and in the early days of the pandemic, the mission was under strain as there would be many Singaporeans overseas who would need help, and for a small mission in a popular destination like London, it was all hands on deck.

I was transparent and told her what my boss wanted, which was to stay put in Singapore as a backup, but I also said I knew the mission needed all available manpower and if I was required to go back, I would not hesitate.  The head of mission really appreciated my gesture (especially when others affiliated to the mission had simply left for home without notifying them - my case was slightly different as I was home on leave when the pandemic began) but respected my boss' wishes and just asked that we write in officially. 

There are still some 17 months to go before my posting ends, but I miss you guys and I suppose it is a sign that I can't wait to come home when I am already thinking about the end of the posting.  I hope the time will pass uneventfully and the world comes back to something close to normal, whatever it is going to look like.

So it's New Year's Eve, and I thought it would be good to take a walk to wrap up the year.  It seemed quite appropriate that at the part of the day when I decided to go for a walk, the temperature edged upward from 0 degrees to 1 degree - 2020 to 2021 get it?

Many people were out and about, though fewer than I expected.  It does seem to me that there are still tourists arriving in the country.  I guess if there are no restrictions on going home after that, people would still take a chance to come, even though most places are not even open.  But it does offer a chance to see London for instance, in a way you would not get any other time in history.  On a more general note, my time here has given me an insight into the country, into Western culture during a particularly stressful time and what lessons there might be. More on that another time.

Lambeth Bridge on a grey day.  I crossed it to walk along one of my favourite paths.

One of my favourite photo spots on Embankment

Hungerford Bridge - it connects South Bank to Embankment and Charing Cross stations.  On the right you can see the railway bridge.

A familiar name from home - Outram.  This is Sir James Outram, a general who made his name in India.

Whitehall Gardens

#1 reason not to have a statue - birds like it.